


If Only

by ConnorBlueNovak



Series: A Small Dean in a BIG World. [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Age Play Little Dean Winchester, Angel Dean Winchester, Domestic Fluff, Dreams and Nightmares, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hatchlings, Multi, Nesting Castiel (Supernatural), Non-Sexual Age Play, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Protective Castiel (Supernatural), Winged Castiel (Supernatural), Winged Dean Winchester, alternative universe, nestlings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:40:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24081454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConnorBlueNovak/pseuds/ConnorBlueNovak
Summary: Chuck Aka God, changes the course of time to not only save one very special Winchester a hell of a lot of unnecessary pain but also everyone else that suffered or dyed due to his, what shall we call it, absence.In this everything is the same as it is on the show until the hell hounds try to take Dean, that's when it all changes. well no that's a lie (sorry) Lucifer was not cast from Heaven and is still an archangel and is good. Beauce. Oh and the boys haven't met Gabrel yet.Evental Little Dean, as Cas takes him on and together they begin the process of Dean's transformation into an Angel. Oh and Sam doesn't drink blood, almost forgot about that.This has nothing to do with my other works 'All the small (and BIG) Things' there in the same series because that series is made for all little Dean works.Ill update the Tags as the story progresses!
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Its a love that can never be broken, Pie/Dean Winchester
Series: A Small Dean in a BIG World. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1736005
Comments: 18
Kudos: 103





	1. Before It Began

**Author's Note:**

> This idea just came from me needing a SPN fix and wanting them all to be alive and happy... even if there is some angst.
> 
> Hope you like it!

Chuck, more commonly known as God with a capital G has looked into the future (as you do when one's not sure about the present) and found that he did not like what was most likely to come and decided to act instead of watch from a distance as a passive onlooker. He decided to not let what could come, pass. He would change Fate or rather change Fates mind.

No longer would he hide behind his writings, no longer would he run. It was time, time to right past wrongs and help bring peace to both Heaven and Earth. The Righteous Man would never know the feeling of the flames in Hell. Not while Chuck had anything to say on the matter!

Though his first stop should probably be to not throw Lucifer out of Heaven and just have a fatherly conversation with him.

_**Castiel’s Pov:** _

Being in charge of a garrison has its perks, Castiel can now make sure that all tasks are seen to quickly and efficiently, he still takes orders but he is also given more time for his ‘extra’ activities which mostly include studying the human species while they go about their daily business.

Castiel has always found them to be fascinating creatures and truly his father's most brilliant creation, as an angel he wasn't born with opinions or free will, he was created to be a perfect soldier and have blind faith in God. 

He does have faith, and he is indeed an excellent warrior (that's why he has his own garrison) and yet… he can help but think that, there's more to life than these two things. Not that he doesn't love and take pride in his role, he does, immensely. But still.

He also knows he is what humans would say, an oddity, he's different than other angels, he feels more. He has likes, that in itself was rather odd. Angels don't have likes, they have orders and that's it. But Castiel does.

He can remember the first time he felt it, like it was just yesterday, his first time on Earth. He had felt it then, like a tug to his grace pulling him in telling him to explore and experience. Not that he could at the time, he was on a mission and not the leader of his garrison back then.

He had felt curious. He wanted more than anything to learn more about this Earth.

The next time Castiel had felt particularly strong emotion was when Balthazar, one of his (many) brothers, had started calling him by a most ridiculous nickname, Cassie. Castiel had been more confused at first not knowing why his brother had suddenly forgotten his name. He wasn't Cassie, he was Castiel. 

He tried to explain as much but his brother only gave a short huff and bemused smile, before ruffling his hair and walking off. And despite Castiels asking them not to call him that (multiple times), the nickname seemed to have stuck with a handful of his brethren, mainly Balthazar and Gabriel.

Now Castiel was positioned on earth watching people pass him by while he sat, almost awkwardly, on a park bench. He liked his human forum, but he was still unsure of how to properly use it, humans are so expressive after all and he had spent a good long time observing them so he would know.

Take walking for instance, should he swing his alms? If so, how much? Or if not would he not look too stiff with them just by his sides? Should he take long striding steps like he'd seen so many men do? Or should he take smaller slower steps so he can take his time? He knew by now that shuffling his feet was bad, he had done that once after seeing another human do so and he had gotten many stars and his shoes had been more damaged at the end of his day.

There were a lot of rules to being human too, not just the laws they abide to, some of which are not very popular. Apparently, there are also many unwritten rules also like chewing with your mouth closed, this one he understood it was rather unpleasant to hear and see.

However, a rule he didn't understand was gender identification, why was pink only acceptable for women to wear, Castiel thought that the colour pink is quite pretty. He also didn't understand why male children couldn't play with dolls. He had been in a shop once where he had seen a small boy of about three look down at a small dollie like it was the most amazing thing in all of creation. Castiel was rather ruffled when the boy had asked his mother quietly politely if he could use his pocket money and get it.

Castiel had thought it was very sweet, letting a child learn and grow competition was important in their development. The boys mother, on the other hand, had smacked it out of the child's hands and told him angrily that ‘little boys don't play with girly toys’ and had marched him out the store.

This is the first time Castiel had ever been angry, the poor boy doesn't deserve to be spoken to so harshly for liking something. Castel had considered getting the toy and leaving it in the boy's room, but didn't just in case he would be punished if his mother had found it.

Now he wasn't in a store or busy city, he was in a small town just off the coast. He stopped his observation of a couple holding hands in a local diner in favor of watching the birds. Birds were less complex than humans but very much diverse and lovely. 

It was then that it happened, while he watched the birds with a blank face, a little bee buzzed all around the flowers in the park. Castiel had never seen a bee before, he'd seen them in a book and knew what they were but he'd never seen one up close until right now. And he just had to know more.

His expressionless face changed into that of curiosity as he tilted his head a little, trying to get a different angle to view the little insect. 

It is a lovely bright yellow and cute black stripes, Castiel’s not sure why they have strobe but he found them visually pleasing all the same. Perhaps, he wonders, they were for some sort of camouflage, tigers had stripes for these reasons, maybe the bright colours of the bees were to help them blend in with the flowers they collected nectar from.

As he was thinking the little bee had started flying around his head and Castiel was moving his head trying to keep his eyes locked on the creature, only to go cross-eyed when it decided to land on the tip of his nose. 

Perhaps this is how bees initiated an introduction, humans do that, they take one another hands and shake it a few times. Castiels still not sure why they do this ritual.

A quiet rustle of wings told Casteil he was no longer the only angel on this bench, and sure enough, Balthazar was sitting next to him, one leg neatly crossed over the other. 

“You have a flying fluff ball on your nose, brother” he informed Castiel dryly.

Castiel turned his head to face his brother, a little saddened when the bee flew off back to the beds of flowers. 

He frowned “why are they called beds of flowers?” He asked about loud “flowers do not sleep.”

His brother snorted “If we knew everything about humans dear brother you would have to find a new hobby to obsess over.” 

Cas chose to ignore that comment. “Is there something you need to talk to me about, Balthazar?” he asked. 

“Need to, No. What to, yes” Castiel blinked “ok” he said after a pause “what is it?”

Balthazar smirked “Discreet as always, Brother. Alright, I'll talk. Somethings happening, something big, no one’s sure yet but something is coming, back up in Heaven Cassie, we can feel it.”

“Well that's not ominous” Castiel replied coolly his brother rolled his eyes “You spend too much time with Gabriel his bad humor is rubbing off on you.” Cas Shrugged “He calls it sarcasm.” Though from what he can tell sarcasm is more like witty comments or as humans say ‘comebacks.’

“Is it anything to be worrying about?” Cariel continued with their more serious conversation. “A demon uprising? Or something unknown?”

“That's the thing Cassie” his brother said almost grumpily “know one knows, and I mean no one and not a damn thing”

“Language” Castiel said automatically but Bal ignored him. “We don't know if it's dangerous, or what it is or if we just know it's coming, and soon.” Balthazar stood up “your needed back in Heaven, all the garrisons are being called because of what's going on”

Sensing something else was missing Cas asked “why didn't you tell me this first?” it would make more sense to do so if he were being asked to return to Heaven. But then again, why was he being sent a message in person rather than in his mind?

“Because I want to talk to you away from prying eyes before we get there. Lison Cassie, there's been talk. Talk about Raphael.”

“What about him?” Castiel said he not understanding the warning tone in his brother's voice. 

“He's been acting odd recently, been seen talking to other angels in strange locations, he spends less and less time with the other archangels and more time by himself and it's just a little shady to me.”

Angels have been given a new lease of life over the past decade and they were all still trying to come to terms with it so everyone was acting a little off.

“Maybe he just needs space” Cas said, it was something he'd heard humans tell each other when a friend or loved one had asked for time alone.

It seemed reasonable enough, sometimes he felt most at peace laying in a field and just watching the clouds float by. Not everything had to be so sinister, then again, despite this line of thought, Castiel was not one to be flippant about things.

“What do you think he's up to?” he asked but the look in his brother's eyes answered that question before he had asked.

“Raphael has also been more for power than most,” Balthazar said carefully “And with father still being gone after years, well.” he shrugged, letting the obvious state itself.

Cas nodded “I'll keep an eye out” he said before standing up himself and getting ready to take flight, sticking out his wings to their full extent, his brother next to him doing the same. Just as the pair were about to take off a loud BOOM echoed around making the two fall to their knees.

It stopped almost as soon as it started. Castiel looking around in a dazed panic found that only he and Balthazar were affected, the humans that were close by had not seemed to notice a thing. 

Looking back at his brother Castiel tries again to test his new theory. And yet again right before he took off that same booming sound forced him and Bal to their knees.

“What on Earth!” Balthazar explained “was that?”

“ I don't know” Castiel said in earnest, he had never heard that sound before, and Cas was born before the birth of Earth. 

“Yes well whatever it is, it clearly doesn't want us to return to Heaven” he said a deep frown forming.

“You think it was Raphial?” Castiel inquired, he was looking up at the sky now as if it would give him some clue as to what just happened.

“Who else?” Balthazar said, “I don't know anything else besides an Archangel that can stop other Angels from going to Heaven.”

But before Castiel could reply both of their heads snapped up and to the right as the unmistakable howl of hellhounds ripped through the air.

Before Castiel even made a conscious decision his body sprang into action and as he took off flying he wasn't stopped by some unknown force. He was at the source of the commotion within a blink of an eye and found not only several hellhounds but also a demon trying to barge their way into a room.

He could hear the sounds coming from the other side and listened intently as he reddy his blade.

“Dean just run I'll handle this!” someone yelled emotions flaring with barely concealed anger and fear as he spoke. 

“No Sam, I'm not running, and you're not facing these fuckers alone!” and eventual angry but far more scared voice shot back.

Before this Sam person could reply the doors were finally broken down by the hounds, as they did Castiel got a glimpse of a face, a flash of jade eyes and a flicker of the most beautiful soul he had ever seen. 

At this moment Castiel felt more alive than he ever had, gone were the days of his unquestioned faith and now, now he has found something, someone, truly worth fighting for. The soul in front of his is damaged, damaged and cracked but shining so brightly, it almost looked like grace.

Castiel was momentarily bewildered by this man in front of him and for a few seconds just stood there, taking in the scene before him, then coming back to life before it was too late he darted ahead and plunged his blade into the hounds back, cutting its horred body in two.

The two young men had started fighting also, but they couldn't see the beasts and were doing a poor job, their lives made even more difficult as both seemed to be trying to protect the other if the situation had not been so dire Castiel would have found this fascinating.

Castiel wrenched the blade from the fallen beast and lunged at the one the green-eyed man was trying to fend off, with one calculated and derived maneuver Castiel sided stepped one hound and beheaded the one attacking the human in one graceful motion, not stopping before turning and stabbing the one behind him in the chest.

Instinctively Castiel pushed the socked man behind himself and held eye contact with the last two hounds that were circling them like sharks. Only they couldn't breathe underwater and were instead from hell.

One of the hellhounds made a lunge for the other man now and Castiel knocked it back just before it got its jaws around the large man's arm.

The man with green eyes apparently wasn't one for running or hiding, because when the hound that Castiel wasn't fighting leaped forward to attack him the man had some felt its presence and kicked the mutt hard in the side of the head.

Cas makes quick work of the hellhound closed to him then swirled around, blade ready to attack the last of them, only to find Balthazar yanking his own blade from the now-dead beast's neck.

He and his brother locked eyes for a moment before Bal looked at the humans and drawled “well that was fun Cassie, but I don't clean up the mess.” then flew off, presumably to Heaven.

Cas turned slowly to face the men he just helped, both of which were looking at him with both curiosity and suspicion. Well, it's not like he just saved them or anything.

“What the fuck are you, man?” the one with green eyes said, Dean Castiel believes is his name, he can recognize the voice from earlier. So that means the other one is Sam.

Castiel noted that he had said what and not who, however, he replied in the same way he would have if asked who he was.

“I am Castiel, Angel of the Lord.”


	2. Language, Dean

_**Dean’s Pov:** _

Sam is insane, and now it's finally official. When that ‘man’ or so-called ‘Angel’ showed up he practically bent himself backward to introduce himself and make a ‘good’ first impression. Honestly, the guy could have said he was anything to try and gain their trust, and who the fuck was that other dude who just popped out of existence?

None of this makes any sense to the family because Dean knew for a fact that Angels do not exist. If they did there wouldn't be so much evil in the world, like frigin demons.

No. Dean is one hundred percent an Atheist and nothing can or will change his mind. Not Sam and certainly not this stranger, who by the way could be any sort of monster or demon. No way Dean will be tricked into so easily trusting what is most likely a psycho killer out to get him and his oh so gullible brother.

While thinking about all this Sam had been excitedly talking to the ‘Angel’ about what they do. “And wendigo’s are a real bitch to kill, right Dean?” Sam gave his brother a pointed look that said all too plainly that he better start acting nicely.

Dean however just grunted, as soon as Sam had spoken to Dean to try, yet again, to pull him into the conversation the ‘Angel’ turned his full undivided attention into him, piercing him with blue eyes so intensely that Dean felt like he was searching his very soul.

He squirmed in place and barely grunted as affirmation, those eyes made him feel far too self-conscious. And agitated.

“Can you even prove you're an Angel?” he said unable to hold back on his skepticism.

“Dean!” Sam exclaimed “What?” “He saved our lives, Dean!” Dean just rolled his eyes. Yes, he saved them, not that Dean couldn't have killed them himself (he could Dammit!), but that act of ‘kindness’ could very well be a rouse to gain their trust to get closer to them. Maybe their friends too, and then, ultimately kill them all. 

While Dean was thinking of this, the Angel Castiel frowned and slightly tilted his head. “Dean” he said in an unusual gravelly tone of voice. “I'm not here to harm you, or your friends. That I swear.” 

Dean almost fell over backwards “can you read minds or some shit?” 

“Language, Dean.” is all he said before looking around the room at the pools of blood where the hellhounds had been slain. (Dean and Sam not being able to see them of course) 

While the guy was for whatever reason preoccupied Dean gestured for his brother to follow him out the room. 

“This is unbelievable” Sam said as soon as the doors closed behind them a look of oaur on his face.

“Yeh Sammy it is unbelievable, as in I don't believe any of this shit.” Dean grabbed his brother by the arm and started dragging him outside to the Impala. “Cam on Sam we're leaving.”

To his credit Sam did put up a bit of a fight, complaining that Dean shouldn't just jump to conclusions and even refusing to let himself be dragged along. It was only when Dean said they needed to get on the move before Lilith or any other hellhounds show up, since they know where they are that Sam got into the car.

Cool air blew through the open windows as Dean sped down the winding road. Driving always made him think more clearly and calm him down. He would never admit it but the hellhounds had shaken him to the core.

“I still think we should have gotten him to come with us” Sam said for what felt like the hundredth time. 

“Sammy” Dean said “we've been over this, he could be anything. A demon, a monster, or anything!” 

“I can assure you, Dean, I am no monster and certainly no Demon,” Castiel said from the backseat of the Impala, he leaned forwards and one of his hands was on Dean's seat.

“Holy mother of Fuck”

“Language, Dean” 

“Wh..eh.huh...How did you even get in here, huh!” Dean stumbled over the words, embarrassed at getting told off, seriously who is they guy!?

Castiel tilted his head and looked fully at Dean “I told you, Dean, I am Castiel Angel of the lord.”

“Stop laughing Sam! And you stay outta my head!” He gripped the steering wheel tighter and took the next turn, having looked it up earlier he knew the way to a fairly cheap motel, after this day he needs his four hours.

“So Castiel” Sam started after Dean had made his point of ignoring them both, “Can ask you some questions?” ever eager to learn eh Sammy boy. 

“Yes, you may ask me questions” Castiel replied, seeming almost as interested in what Sam would ask as much as Sam was in the answer he hoped to get.

Sam did an almost three-sixty turn to face the angel, as said angel sat back and got himself comfortable in the backseat. 

“Heaven and Hell, are they real?” 

“Yes, of course, they’re real” He said as if it were obvious.

And thus started Dean's ever-growing headache. Stupid Sam and his stupid questions and that stupid person that keeps saying he's a stupid angel who keeps answering stupid Sam's stupid questions! Easy to say Dean felt like the world was stupid and only he saw the possible threat of this man.

Why oh why was Sam so trusting of him? And why the heck is Dean not kicking him out of his baby? Turning on the radio and blasting Bon Jovi, Dean tried his best to block out his passenger's conversation. This earned him a Sam Winchester famous bitchface and a curious look from Castiel.

“What music is this?” the angel asked yet again leaning closer to Dean with zero regards to personal space.

“Rock” He replied shortly, he didn't know why but Castiel's closeness bothered him, not that he was someone that was physically close to anyone, he didn't really trust anyone enough to have much physical contact. But this wasn't the normal type of ‘bothered’ that he normally got when people were invading his space, no. He was itching to be closer, but that's ridiculous.

Castiel Frowned “There's no talk about rocks in theses lyrics, Dean”

“Oh for the love of. It's not about rocks Cas! It's Rock music, the genre is rock.” it's like the guys been living under a rock for his entire life.

“Genre” Castiel replied “Like book genre. Horror and romance, comedy and Non-Fiction?” 

“ I guess, look I don't know people just call it that, ok” it seemed like the conversation was over. Sam shook his head with a smile and got out his phone, likely geeking out about the new things he's been told. Castiel was looking out the window, seemingly fascinated by everything that passed by.

“Do you like Bees, Dean? I like bees, they're very important to the ecosystem” Dean groaned. And was very thankful when he pulled into the motels rundown parking lot five minutes later even if Castiel was still ranting about the wonders of bee kind. 

After getting their room for the night, the boys dumped their stuff on their chosen beds, Sam picking the one closed to the door and Dean having the one a few feet behind.

“I'm gonna head out for a food run, ok Sammy” Dean said almost immediately after he claimed his bed. A Little fresh air would do him some good and a burger sounded amazing right now. 

“Sure, sure” his brother said “I'm gonna do a little research into Lilith, see what I can find.” Dean snagged his walled and walked out the door putting not noticing he was being followed.

It was dark out now and up above the stars could be seen along with a pale half-moon, at least there'd be no werewolves out to get 'em tonight. The cool night's slight breeze calmed Dean, his nerves have been all but fried these past few months and it's really taken to its toll. 

It had taken him nearly become dog chow for him to realize how utterly terrified he was of the thought of going to hell, he's never seen it before of course, but you know. It's hell, it's gotta be… well… Hell.

He's glad he's not down there but he also knew that the hound, the daemons they would all come for him and try to drag him down there again and again. Until they eventually got him. 

A shudder rolled through his body that had nothing to do with the temperature. Dean didn't want to go to hell, I mean who does?! But at the same time, he couldn't bring himself to regret his decision to bring back his brother, it wasn't fair how he died and him staying dead… Well, that wasn't an option.

Hell was still a problem looking over his head however and no matter how much he wanted to ignore it the voice in the back of his head reminded him of his lowest most despite part of his coping with the realization that he would end up downstairs.

Once, just once he had taught that there could be a possibility of not going to hell. That he could maybe cheat the system. That if he wasn't killed by a hellhound his soul won't end up being torched for eternity. 

On a particularly bad night, he had been pondering this idea, but ultimately couldn't follow through with his plan, even if there were no reason for hoping, Dean couldn't stop himself from doing so. He burned his goodbye letter to Sam and swore to himself that he would never let that darkness come to mind again. 

“Dean you will not go to hell” a graveled voice called out from behind him. 

“Jesus!” Dean yelled metaphorically, jumping out of his skin. He turned and found himself almost nose to nose with…

“Dean I am in no form Jesus, I am Castiel An...”

“Angel of the lord I know, I heard you the first hundred times” Dean finished taking a step back and trying to calm himself down before he had a heart attack and died on the spot.

Castiel tilted his head “I have told you who I am three times Dean, not one hundred.” he corrected, looking at Dean worriedly as if he had a head memory problem. 

Dean just frowned at him “Ok so why are you following me? Or were you trying to give me a heart attack?” 

“Why would I want to give you a heart attack?” 

“Just answer the Damn question”

“Language Dean” 

He groaned, not for the first time today getting frustrated and it didn't help that he was tired and hungry as well.

“Cas why are you following me?” Dean asked again, looking directly into the angel's eyes, which was a massive mistake on his part. Castiel's eyes were an endless blue of warmth and trust, it was like looking into the heart of a star, beautiful yet so obviously not from here.

Castiel put a hand on his shoulder “Dean?” he asked, the torch pulling Dean out his stupor and back to the conversation.

“What!” he said diverting his gaze to the floor.

“I said I am following you to protect you” Looking back up, but purposely not looking in his eyes, Dean glared. Protecting? Dean? That's not right, Dean can look out for himself thank you very much, Mr. Angel of the Lord.

“I don't need protecting, and I certainly don't need a babysitter” He snapped hotly before starting to walk off in a huff. I mean who does this guy think he is huh? Me needing protection, as if! I'm a hunter for fuck's sake! I protect people!

Castiel, however, didn't seem to understand the common courtesy of a dramatic exit because not ten seconds after Dean had walked off he appeared in front of him.

“Don't do that!” Dean said after yet again feeling like he was going to die from angel pop-ups.

“Do what?” Castiel asked and the battered had the nerve to do that head thing and sound generally confused. Like he did nothing wrong!

“That!” Dean said “Popping up out of nowhere, like a damn flash mob of one!”

Realy, Dean just wants a burger and his four hours, which he feels like he's earned after putting up with all this shit. And Pie. Mmm Pie. Pie sounds great right now, maybe cherry or banana cream. Oh, or apple, with vanilla ice cream! Oh, pie sounds like heaven. Yeh Dean should definitely get some pie. Or a lot of pie… You can never have too much pie, Damitt!

“Why is pie so important, Dean?” Castiel said breaking Deans's amazing daydreams of jumping in a pool full of every flavored pie.

“Dammit Cas, stay out of my head!” why and how can he even do that! It's a huge disadvantage. And pane not fair!

“Language, Dean” 

“Of for god's sake” 

“I don't understand what my father has to do with pie”

“Do you even know what pie is?”

“Of course… Theoretically”

Dean squinted at him, so Castiel’s never had pie before, that needs to change, right now. “fine, well if your gonna follow me around like a lost puppy I might as well show you the real wonders of the world”

He doesn't know why yet, but Dean feels a mutual pull towards Castiel like, despite all concerns, he can trust this person and that. That makes him even more uneasy and curious. 

“Come on Cas, I don't care who or what you are, no one deserves such a cruel fate of living without having pie.”


	3. Starting to Believe

_**Castiel’s Pov:** _

Dean Winchester is a very strange human, Castiel found. Not only with his physical appearance of bow legs and bright green eyes, but he was also strange with his mannerisms, feelings, and thoughts. He also seemed to have a particular fondness for pie, a sort of human dessert made from pastry with different types of fillings. Although if you had asked Dean, he would have said that pie can be eaten in place of any meal, and as dessert, because it's just that good.

Castiel’s not sure if that's perfectly healthy but doesn't say anything. (Wise Choice)

Looking at him now, in the bright yellow glow of the diner's lights anyone would have taught him to be grumpy or angry, he wore a frown and grumbled all his words as if anticipating a fight after every syllable. He was also very twitchy and flinched at the slightest unexpected sound.

Not many people could have noticed it, but Castiel does. Dean was still scared. Not that the man would ever admit it.

Just after their order of pies had been placed on their table Castiel decided to try, yet again, to talk to Dean about the issue at hand.

“Dean, you will not be going to hell, I won't let that happen” Cas tries to put as much conviction in it as possible but Dean had only dug a fork into one of the many slices of pie in front of him and started eating, seemingly savoring the flavor. He did, however, flinch at the word Hell.

After moving on from apple pie to cherry, Dean is now working his way steadily in his quest of devouring a third slice of pie, this time the filling was an (almost sickeningly) Sweet butterscotch and cinnamon combination.

Frowning in confusion Castiel picked up his own fork, perhaps this was some sort of bonding ritual? Pie seemed to be very important to Dean so maybe if Cas took part in eating it Dean would be more willing to talk with him, or at least listen to what he has to say.

Humans, Cas thought, are such strange creatures, strange and fascinating.

Now angels don't need to eat or drink in order to live, their human bodies don't require nutrients at all and neither do their celestial bodies. However, they can consume food and drink if they want, if only for the taste and ‘human experience.’ Castiel's brother Gabriel took great pleasure in the sweeter foods and Balthazar indulged in human cuisine too.

Castiel had never eaten before, he had never found a reason to before now. looking at the pies Cas took his time before choosing a slice with red filling and a pleasant fruity aroma. It was very sweet and he must have made a face because when Dean had looked up at him he snorted, with what Castiel assumed to be amusement.

“Strawberry, huh. Any good?” Dean asked, apparently trying to make small talk.

Castiel decided he does indeed like strawberry pie and told Dean so saying that he was very glad that this was his first meal, that statement seemed to surprise Dean.

“First meal? What you've never eaten before?” he sounded disbelieving but at least now he was looking at Castiel and paying attention to what was before a one-sided, poor attempt at a conversation.

“We don't need to eat and I've never cared to try before now.” thinking of it now Castiel berated himself, he had missed out on much of human culture it seems.

“We? You mean angels right? How many of them are there? What can you do exactly?” It is obvious to Castiel that Dean still doesn't believe him but was instead trying to figure out for himself what he was, despite this Cas answers his questions honestly hoping that perhaps Dean will come to trust him later.

“Yes, Dean, angels and as for numbers there are seven thousand and one of us” Cas paused, letting that sink in. It's a large number and considering Dean had not known they had existed up until today it was a lot to take in. After eating a few more bits of pie Castiel continued.

“As for what we can do, well, that's a little vague. I suppose the main powers we possess would be enhanced senses of sight and hearing, our ability to heal, and with our wings, we can fly.” 

Castiel did not expect the response he had gotten. He had thought that Dean might roll his eyes, ignore him or look at him like he was, as humans call it sometimes when making a joke, pulling his leg. Alas, it was nothing like what he imagined because instead of sarcasm Dean had simply asked.

“Can you show me?”

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ 

Dean wants him to prove that he is, in fact, an angel and if this is the way to do it then Cas was all for it, even if it was a somewhat unorthodox way of doing things. Nodding Castiel stood up and walked for the door of the dinner, Dean following closely beyond him.

Taking a few turns here and there and soon came to a secluded location, safe from prying eyes Castiel stopped and turned to face Dean.

The dim glow of the moon and stars being the only light source to illuminate the area, not much could be seen to the human eye but Castiel could see it all, including Dean shuffling over to him, hands in pockets and eyes searching his surroundings warily. They were now both standing a few feet apart, on a small hill just past the town's edge. 

Castiel had never felt nervus before, not while fighting nor flying, he had never felt the fluttering feeling in his stomach that he was feeling now but he had heard of what they meant. Perhaps it was due to the fact that he had never shown a human his wings before, or maybe it was just because it was Dean.

This human did seem so bent on not believing in the existence of angels, something that worried Castiel as the reasoning behind this he feared was not a good one.

His wings like every other angel were not present when not needed (or wanted) so that the angels could better blend in when down on earth. No, they don't fall off and have to regrow every time and no they didn't just become invisible as invisible wings would still be corporeal.

The wings of an angel were instead transported into a kind of pocket dimension made solely for that one purpose, the process didn't hurt at all, it was merely convenient.

Rolling his shoulders Cas took another few steps back so that he'd have plenty of space for his extra appendages, that, not even seconds later Castiel could once again feel, the familiar lightweight at his back, his midnight feathers catching, spectacularly, in the gentle light looking down on them. 

He could hear Dean make a sort of breathless gasp and as Castiel looked up he could see the man's mouth agape, his eyes racking across the glossy feathers of his wings which were both huge with a total length of six meters each.

The undeniable evidence of Castiel's existence seemed to dawn on Dean's face as his green eyes locked with Castiel's own blue ones. Behind them, Cas could see curiosity, wonder, and something else, something he didn't quite recognize. 

Clouds formed overhead as Cas took the steps forward, efficiently closing the space between the two, still seemingly unaware of personal space.

“You sure you're not a goose-man?” Dean asked a small smile playing at his lips, it was clear to Cas then, that Dean for whatever reason didn't show his own genuine reactions and responses to things, instead opting for a false bravado of confidence.

“Yes, Dean I am one hundred percent sure I am no goose” he replied, still fervently keeping eye contact despite the humans squirming.

“Well, I said goose-man but sure” Dean looked at both Castiel's wings again, his eyes flitting from one to the other, a slight frown creasing his forehead.

“Cas, can I ask you something?” he said after a while of what seemed to be him in deep concentration.

“Yes, of course, you can” Castiel was just happy the man seemed to be talking to him now, rather than just scowling, then again Castiel's attention had been largely with Sam during the ride to the motel, the taller man did have so many questions after all.

“Why are your wings black? In all the books ‘n movies angels had white wings” Dean had asked it rather shyly for his character as if he were saying something he felt was silly.

“Well all angles have their own individual wings and not two of ever the same, I imagine that the reason why humans believe us all to possess white wings is due to the fact that the first and oldest angel, Michael, has completely white wings”

He and Dean talked for nearly an hour, discussing all the colors wings could be, what heaven was like and why Cas had come to his and his brothers rescue before Castiel had begun to worry for the human's health. The night was getting rather cold and though it would not hurt an angel he had heard that being too cold could harm a human.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ 

Arriving back at the motel, with much complaining from Dean Castiel sat in a chair by the door and busied himself with a book he had found in the living space while Dean had gone into the bathroom to have a shower and brush his teeth.

Half an hour later and Castiel only just noticed the shower had been turned off when a rather exhausted looking Dean opened the door and all but belly-flopped on the nearest bed, not bothering to go under the covers or even change out of his day clothes.

Why he had even put on the same clothes he wore before having the shower Cas didn't know, what he did know however was that humans preferred comfort when sleeping and seeing Dean sprawled, starfish-like and face down on top the covers, Cas could easily say that he did not look comfortable in the slightest.

Maybe Dean was simply too tired, or more likely to impatient to do these things before going to bed, either way, Castiel decided to do something about it. After checking that Dean was sleeping soundly the angel got to work. 

First checking Deans duffle bag for more comfy looking clothes and finding sweatpants and a cotton band shirt he moved back over to the occupied bed and set the clothes down beside the sleeping man.

He quickly removed his old clothes and gently maneuvered Dean's limbs into the new ones. Throwing aside the worn and frankly dirty clothing Castiel easily picked up Deran from the bed, much like any person would pick up a tiny kitten that weighs next to nothing, and pulled down the blankets before setting the human back down and wrapping the quilt securely around him.

Cas gently stroked the back of his hand against the slightly cool check of Dean's face, proud of himself for taking such good care of the beautiful soul before him.

Walking back over to the chair and picking his book back up, Cas smiled at the sleeping form of the older Winchester, he didn't even want to think of what could have happened to him if he and Balthazar had not intervened. 

Though it did bring that mysterious force back into question, whatever it was Castiel couldn't help but wonder if it had stopped them from going back to Heaven to save Dean and Sam. 

Pondering this Castiel decided to talk with his brother later to see what he could make of the recent events, for now, he had to watch over Dean.

Oh and read this lovely book about aquatic wildlife!


	4. Chapter 4

_**Dean’s Pov:** _

He had never been to hell, not a glimpse or a peek into what many believed to be the worst place imaginable. Dean had never been to hell. Not once. But for a year now it has haunted him, had lurked around every corner and in every dark space.

Nowhere was safe now, not that he had been particularly safe before.

Now though, Dean’s haunted by the promise of eternal torment so much so that now, in sleep, he felt flames crawl up his legs, wrap around his torso and lick at his face. Soon every inch of him was consumed by fire and all he knew was pain. He couldn't see, breath or feel anything that wasn't smoke or fire, and every cell in his body burnt until he screamed and the fire went down his throat, it was burning him from the inside now too, the melted flesh dripped off his body and he could feel no more

He couldn't move! he couldn't breathe! The world was on fire and he was burning with it!

“Dean! Dean! DEAN!” strong hands clutched his shoulders and shook him, yelling his name. Whoever it was must be burning too! Their voice sounded pained and panicked as they shook him again.

Why were they talking to him? He's on fire they'd just burn themselves. Why aren't they ruining? Can’t they see there's no saving him?

“Dean, Wake up!” the voice told him, ordering him really “you're having a nightmare Dean, it's not real, you must wake up! Now!” and with one last shake, Dean’s eyes finally opened.

And to his surprise and eminence relief, there was no longer pain. He blinked rapidly, no smoke but his eyes still felt sore and dry his skin covered in cold sweat and goosebumps.

It took him a good few moments to realize just where he was and a few more to clue in on the fact that Castiel was standing over him, eyes doing sweeps over his entire body as if looking for damage.

Dean had never noticed how intensely blue they were before, much like two pools of bottomless ocean, pure and clear. They are beautiful. And distracting, pulling himself from the depth of Cas’s eyes he instead focused on his forehead, which was creased in worry.

“Cas? What?” Dean tried to string together a sentence, but before he could bully his sore throat into saying more than two words, Castiel had engulfed him in a warm, solid embrace. Dean let out a, very manly, squeak not expecting the hug. The iron bars of the angel's arms should have felt uncomfortable, Dean normally felt trapped and claustrophobic when hugged, but now…

He felt safe.

“It's alright, Dean. It's alright” Castiel murmured into Dean's ear. The wetness in his eyes seemed to leak and before he knew what he was doing Dean had leaned heavily into the man, burying his head in the crook of Castiel's neck.

He had many nightmares before, he had woken up screaming, cold, and alone many, many times. So why was he now clinging to an almost stranger like his life depended on it? Hunters don't need comfort after a stupid dream.

He tried to pull himself together, tried to break contact with Cas, but his body just seized up at just the thought. He didn't want the hug to end, but he also didn't want to admit that he wanted a hug. Never mind his mental well being Dean's pride was taking a series beating!

“Cas” he crooked “you don't have to… I don't need…” he tried, but Cas was having none of it.

“Hush, Dean. It’s quite normal for humans to seek out comfort after a nightmare”

Comfort? Comfort! Dean doesn't need comfort, he hasn't had it in years and he doesn't need it now. Or want it. Even if, when he pushed Castiel away, he felt a sort of loss.

Castiel’s eyes never left him as he got off the bed and stumbled back a bit. Dean looked down at himself, since when did he change clothes? He remembered just putting his old stuff back on after he had a shower, which by the way, was as cold as Antarctica! 

Looking back at the angel where he was still standing next to the bed, Dean could also see that the covers were all messed up like someone had been underneath them sleeping. But Dean remembered being too tired to bother.

Standing there, not knowing what to do with himself, he watched apprehensively as Castiel started walking slowly towards him like he was approaching a frightened animal and was trying not to spook it. Once standing in front of him, with Dean’s personal space sufficiently invaded, Castiel spoke again, his naturally graveled and deep voice gentle.

“Dean, how are you feeling?” he asked, which Dean thought was an easy enough question.

“Like I just got burned alive” Dean had meant to say it sarcastically but his voice wavered and sounded small. Castiel made a motion as if he were going to embrace him again but stopped himself. 

The angel seemed genuinely concerned and leaned forwards to gently wipe away the tears on Dean’s face, looking half heartbroken when Dean stiffened at the touch. He hadn't cried in years, not since Mary. 

Castiel then put a hand under Dean’s chin and made Dean look at him. “I will say it a thousand times a day if I have to, Dean. You. Will. Never. Ever. Go. To. Hell. I won't let you.”

Standing there, his own green eyes staring into the intense blue eyes of Castiel’s, after years of lonely nights, unimaginable pain, abandonment, and grief. Dean finally broke.

He all but collapsed into Castiel's ready arms, tears streaking down his face as the emotional dam he had built himself all those years ago tore itself down and Dean was flooded with every emotion he had not left himself to feel since his mother, childhood, and innocence were so cruelly stripped from him.

Strong, steady hands made soothing circles on Deans back as he let loose the weight of his world, of everything crashing down on him. He couldn't think, there was no room to think, only feel. And right now Dean didn't even understand that.

He had never been good at feelings, didn't understand them, heck, didn't want them most the time they made him feel weak and helpless. Right now in the jumble of hurt, pain, loss, anger, and plain need Dean didn't know what any of them meant.

And he didn't want to, he just wanted them to go away. He just wanted it all to stop spinning and making his head and chest hurt so bad.

During this time Dean had somehow managed to find himself and Castiel on the bed with the angel rocking him gentle in his arms.

_**Castiel’s Pov:** _

Looking into his mind and seeing Dean's dream was heartbreaking, to say the least, and the look on the human's face, well, you may as well have ripped the vital organ out of his vessel and stopped it. Dean looked so small and frail in his arms, innocent as the day is long.

Castiel slowly formed a plan, a way to once and for all save Dean Winchester the man with a soul brighter than a thousand burning suns, he would find a way even if he himself had to die in the process.

At that thought, Castiel blinked, why does he feel so strongly about Dean? This one human he has only met but a few more hours ago? There was a pull, a need to protect Dean that Castiel doesn't understand. He contemplated this for a good long while until Sam came back from wherever he had wandered off to.

“Hay Castiel have yo…” Sam stopped talking abruptly at the sight of his big brother lying on top of the angel, Cas looked down too, not remembering when Dean had fallen asleep, or how he could after such a dream.

“Er… What's going on?” Sam asked looking unsure of what he was meant to be doing. He wore the same clothes he had on earlier and carried a plastic bag in one hand, he stood staring at the pair with a confused frown on his face.

“He had a nightmare,” Cas said helpfully, then added “About hell” when he saw that Sam's expression had not changed.

“Yeh he has them sometimes, been worse the past month or so” he put the bag down on his bed and pulled out a salad most likely brought from a store going by the look of the packaging. “I can't find out any more on Lilith or a way to break the deal Dean made, I know you've already helped us but Castiel… Is there a way for you to save Dean? Is there any way to save my brother?”

The raw desperation in Sam's voice was clear and the look in his eyes said all to plant that he blames himself for his brother's predicament. Both brothers were suffering from this.

Cas lay down Dean head on a pillow and went over to the other Winchester “Yes Sam, I believe there's a way for me to save Dean and his soul” a difficult task, something that would take up much time and effort but something Castiel felt compelled to do, he would talk to Deans brother first then make his request to an Archangel, Gabriel would be the best option since he was closer to him than the others.

“Sam, have you ever heard of a Hatchling?”

A hatchling is the angel equivalent of a toddler and can be the first faze for a human becoming a Nephilim, the most common first stage of development however is the nestling faze which is the angel equivalent to a young child.

During these stages, the human undergoing them will slowly regress into a younger forum for ensemble if a human were becoming a hatchling their body would start de-aging into a toddler likewise for becoming a nestling.

These Nephilim-to-be will also mentally regress, to a certain degree. They will still have their old memories and are still themselves. They still think and feel the same but they will also get the urges and have the needs of a child.

Now the nest and final stage before completing the change is the fledgling faze where the ‘baby angel’ will basically be a teenager and not so far from adulthood.

Now the reason why Castiel asked Sam specifically about hatchlings is that the humans taking the change generally only become them if more time and care is needed for them to properly heal and Dean has been through more pain than Castiel can fathom so it's no guess as to what he will become.

All of this is expanded to the younger Winchester, that and Castiel plan of Dean becoming his hatchling, and angel to be. At first, Sam was skeptical but after hearing how this could and would save Dean from hell but also nurture his soul into becoming whole again he couldn't say no.

“Okay,” Sam said after a long pause “if he says yes, and getting him to agree will be difficult, but if he says yes then I won't stop you.” 

“He'll say yes” Cas assured him “I'll be back soon, you'll take care of him tel, then?” he asked only waiting long enough for Sam to nod before making his way to Heaven.


End file.
